It's a good thing my husband doesn't have a foot fetish...

Here are my swollen-ass Fred Flinstone Feet after a long day. Notice how they puff out of the Birkenstocks they are squeezed into? Also, observe my cankle rolls. Yes, it's possible to have cankles on your cankles.

Nooooow, I'd like you to notice how after the Birkenstock is removed, it still appears that I am wearing Birkenstocks. Buckles and all.

Looooove it.

Oh, and just for reference... this is what my feet NORMALLY look like.

Gorgeous

I am officially in awe of what my husband and I have created. My son is the most beautiful thing I've ever seen. I'm in love and I haven't even met him yet. I'd introduce you more formally, but he still has no name.